30 Things Before 30

I love reading these so I'm going to write my own version

I am tragically turning 30 tomorrow and to make myself feel better, I’m making you read 30 things (lessons? thoughts? musings? just yapping?) beforehand. You’re older than me so it doesn’t really matter but since I love reading these sorts of lists, I wanted to write one myself. Here’s a photo of me as a fressshhhhh baby for the thumbnail. And my brother as Peter Pan. A brand new baby sister and he still got to go trick-or-treating.

In the immortal words of Amy March, I am not a poet, I’m just a girl. But a girl who is just constantly realizing things. So without further ado, here are 30 things/lessons/realizations I have come across:

1. When I start feeling mentally insane it’s probably because my period is starting in about 3 days.

2. TikTok astrology only works when I ignore it.

3. The best skincare routine:

   1. Day time: rinse with water, serum (or two, max), moisturizer/SPF

   2. Night time: oil cleanser to wash the makeup off, regular cleanser to get the oil off, serum (or two, max), retinol (sometimes), moisturizer

4. Night showering is better.

5. Read all contracts, leases, and terms very carefully.

6. Talking to my mother about my problems does actually make me feel better, most of the time.

7. Unfortunately, it’s time to get serious about dating.

8. Sometimes I really do just need to have a piece of bread and calm down a little.

9. I like to own a lot of things and everything brings me joy. Sue me. For the most part, minimalists are pretentious elitists. No you’re not better than me with your 4 product makeup routine.

10. I’ll never find the perfect red lipstick so I have to suck it up with the ones I own. Fenty HBIC is verrrry close but I would prefer a better formula.

11. The best coat and jacket collection actually belongs to my father.

12. The fatalistic mindset is starting to catch up to me. Living for the hope of it all isn’t an automatic set-up for disappointment.

13. I recommend having a go-to audiobook for the car or when you’re trying to fall asleep. Sometimes music can get boring and your own thoughts get too loud. Personally, I always have at least one Harry Potter book downloaded.

14. Stop trying to be right all the time. Sometimes just let things go. Time, curious time.

15. My friends don’t hate me.

16. And stop being so surprised when people remember who I am.

17. It’s fine that One Direction is still in my yearly wrapped. (Edit: well.)

18. Always have at least one Trader Joe’s frozen meal on hand.

19. I like the way Midwesterners smile to each other on walks. It’s very polite.

20. It’s good to have go-to drinks for every occasion: chai latte, gin and tonic, or diet coke.

21. To-do lists do actually make everything seem more manageable.

22. I am never allowed to cut my hair short again.

23. Some people are for a season or whatever that saying goes.

24. Simply showing up for friends is the best and strongest love language.

25. The key is a brown liquid eyeliner. My favorite right now is the Nyx Epic Ink liner in milk chocolate.

26. I do think everyone looks better with bangs. I don’t think foreheads were meant to see that much sun.

27. Love yourself blah blah blah but I think it’s fine that I still have insecurities. Gives me something to strive towards, you know? Three most pressing things for me right now: my nose bridge (or lack thereof), my lower lashes (or lack thereof), and my chin (or lack thereof).

28. The joy I get from buying one nice sweater per year is unadulterated and unmatched. Everyone deserves one nice sweater per year.

29. Sometimes Usually I just have to let things play out. Things will be fine. I’ll be fine. We’ll all be fine. The world kept spinning. My mom still loves me. I’m fine.

30. And finally, 29 is soooo old. I am literally the oldest I’ll ever be at 29. But 30 is sooooooo young. I will literally have never been younger than when I’m 30.